Another Valentine’s Day is here, though it does not feel like love is in the air. We are two months into 2019, and living in a politically rancorous age. Although the President is calling for people to come together, Americans are not likely to do so. With polarization at its highest level in nearly 25 years, America is a house divided, and not just in Congress.
So in this age of poisonous animosity, how can one celebrate love, or even find it?
Partisan politics has infiltrated the world of dating now more than ever. Following the 2016 election, online dating platform eHarmony released data that indicates a spike in public political affiliation within dating profiles. In the summer of 2016, less than a quarter of men and women answered the political affiliation question on their dating profiles. By 2017, that number had more than doubled for women and nearly tripled for men.
With such extreme degrees of partisanship becoming central to relationships, single Americans find themselves politically estranged. Single women have skewed towards the liberal and Democratic end of the political spectrum, while single men, specifically whites, are now more likely to be conservative and Republican. With the gender gap widening because of political polarization, marriage rates have understandably declined. According to Pew Research, the share of American adults who have never been married is at a historic high of twenty percent, compared to only nine percent in 1960. Adults who do get married are choosing to do so much later in life, and placing emphasis on their partner having the same moral and religious beliefs.
A 2018 study published in the Journal of Politics found that men and women are also prioritizing political ideology more than ever in their marriages. According to the survey, there has been a steady increase in politically homogenous households since the 1960s. In 1965, spouses’ political views were in alignment about seventy-four percent of the time. By 2016, spousal political alignment had jumped to eighty-two percent. Over the same period, political disagreement fell from thirteen percent to six percent.
With Americans increasingly prioritizing political homogeneity in relationships, the future of love in the US looks bleak. According to a Pew analysis, current marriage trends indicate that one out of every four adults will have never married by the year 2030. This would be the highest percentage of unmarried adults in the United States in recorded history.
So, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, Americans might do themselves and the country a service by looking to enter relationships that challenge them, and to look for things they share in common that are deeper, and more fundamentally important than politics.
For more on Valentine’s Day and the state of relationships in 2019, listen to this week’s Femsplainers Valentine’s Day special.
This Valentine’s Day, consider breaking out of your political comfort zone. Swipe right on someone whose beliefs challenge yours. If you find yourself in a relationship where your values are at odds, remind yourself to be patient, be kind, and to listen. Be passionate about your values, but be more passionate about what brings you together.
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